July 7, 2021

by drplasticpicker

Hopefully yesterday was the last root canal. I felt literally “beat up” again. My dentist reminds me of my former co-chief resident in Pediatrics at Mans Greatest Hospital Dr. T. He. She is a really kind person. My dentist was very young, and she was very skilled with her nerve blocks and I hardly felt anything when she was doing things. She had a brusque manner of speaking but she was gentle in her care of me. I appreciated that.

I woke up irritable today. I watched too much Dawson’s Creek, as I was recovering from my hopefully last root canal. I must not be the only one getting root canals, the dentist office seemed busy. My mortgage broker also said that her family member needed a root canal too. It must be a trend post COVID. Too much snacking.

But on reflecting upon yesterday, it had been a good day. I made it through 3 hours at the dentist, handling appointment access problem without bothering anyone. I also led my first Immunization Task Force meeting and it went really well. I’m really proud of myself for helping to reorganize that meeting and stream-line that entire committee. It’s a huge accomplishment, saving the organization time which is saving money. Yet that committee is now more effective because I made it project focused. We also decided it would be completely virtual, and save on travel time. We no longer take minutes, and only do action items.

And today I’ll just be a doctor today. I’ll show up at clinic and see my patients. I miss seeing my patients. I’ve been either in medical school or a doctor 22 years now. That is a long time. I’ve been studying medicine or practicing medicine longer than the before. It’s why I call myself Dr. Plastic Picker. That Doctor was something I had wanted so much, and to lose that – would be not the ending I wanted.

I’ll send some work emails and deal with some scheduling issues, and send an email about the mentoring award. Did you know about the department mentoring award? That was months in planning and thinking and a labour of love for me years ago. It meant a lot because the person the mentoring award is named after gave me a professional home when he took a chance and hired me. I have felt throughout my career sincere gratitude for his support. I have to remind myself that I’m at that stage in my career that there are some people who care about my opinion. It’s hard for me to make that adjustment. I tend to view my premedical students with clear eyes and I mentor them with my whole heart. My colleagues, it’s harder. To be a true departmental leader, is truly about building future leaders. If one does not hold that as your north star (a phrase our HMO holds up constantly) than one better leave your position and let someone else in it. Physician wellness is about effective physician leaders as well. That is why physician wellness and burn-out is so complicated. It’s not an easy problem to fix. Neither is climate change.

But through the last two years as I’ve gotten better, I realized that I have to keep on trying. I have to keep on plugging along. Why would I leave the rest of my colleagues behind? We all need to do this together. We need to bring back meaning to medicine. We need to save the earth for our children. For me, these two tasks go hand in hand. Physician wellness. Climate and health activism. It motivates me and gives me urgency.

But today I’ll take a breather. The root canal did me in again. It’s my kryptonite. 22 years in medicine. That’s a long time.

The picture of the bridge? I just wanted to show it to you – that is all. Architectural or technical drawings are works of art.

July 6, 2021

by drplasticpicker

Two big things happened this weekend. I final submitted for our author group Durrwachter-Erno Et Al our paper titled “Informing Policy on Built Environments to Safeguard Children in Environmental Justice Communities: Case Study of Five American Academy of Pediatrics Climate Advocates” to the Journal of Applied Research on Children. This was the final edits after the copy-editor read through. It seemed like a simple process fixing the citations and doing the rewording, but it took all weekend and probably a combined 10 hours of actual work. Commas are important, and citations have to be formatted a certain way. It was a labour of love for all six of us. The round-table discussion from Children At Risk will be made available today as well, where they interviewed our author group along with two other climate and health related papers. During this process, I half fell in love with the copy editor (with my husband’s knowledge) as I felt his last read that he really understood what we were trying to impart. My hubsand was an editor of several highschool and college publications and an English major, and he understood.

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July 5, 2021

by drplasticpicker

It’s a holiday today. I have to finish the final edits to the paper on Environmental Justice for our AAP author group. I’m in the middle of fixing the citations. It’s not as easy as it looks. I spent about three hours on it yesterday, and it will take another two to three hours to fix the citations. All the citations had to be fixed and reordered. I’m confused as to why Mendeley (the free endnote program) did not format the citations the way the copy editor wanted? If I try to write another academic paper, I’m going to just get the right endnote program. But it’s almost done, and I will submit today.

We did submit our abstract for the AAP National Conference and Exhibition which is in October. I worked on it with one of our premed interns. She did a really good first draft, and I had to do major edits. But it was a shared project and I’m proud of how much she contributed. It’s going to be hard for the interns that follow her. She has been such a dynamic force of good for our young group. That was submitted as well and we put a bunch of other people’s names on the poster, as they have been working on our advocacy group and it gives them whatever kudos they need for their careers.

And I will work on the chair refinishing project. I’m not sure if Mr. Plastic Picker has the day off today. He’s been working essentially all weekend. We did have lunch at my parent’s yesterday. The rest of my family likes their privacy, so no pictures or blog about that. But it was a lovely afternoon all together.

I may deep clean the downstairs floors today. Maybe go with the kids on a hike. I binged watched Dawson’s Creek yesterday. The storyline about the teenager having a relationship with his teacher is so inappropriate. But it’s fun to see Katie Holmes and Michelle Williams when they were young. I totally missed Dawson’s Creek in the 1990s because I was premed and busy studying organic chemistry. Also someone offered us 10,000 to use 2 acres of our Oregon Farm to plant a “special crop” which I’m sure was Marijuana. We said no. Sheesh people. It’s good not to need money. Best reason to be a minimalist and environmenatlist. Because if you need money, you’ll fall into temptation. I may stop watching Dawson’s Creek if the storyline becomes inappropriate. So far, it’s okay.

July 4, 2021

by drplasticpicker

Despite the expression on my trashart winecork friend, I actually had a really nice day yesterday. Most of the day was taking our oldest and myself down to the HMO clinic where I work. It’s further than other offices from our home, but since I work there I prefer to go to where I feel most comfortable. We had a very nice visit with a new optometrist to our group. She was very nice, and around my age. Just joined up, and asked me how long I had been working at our HMO. I told her honestly, “twelve going on thirteen years” and each of those years I have been grateful for.

Anyway, we both got our vision evaluated and ordered glasses. Our son got two pairs and I got one pair. It was fun watching him while he did not know I was watching him – select two frames. He chose two hipster like frames, one square and one round and made plenty of funny faces at himself in the mirror. The only thing Mr. Plastic Picker and I get for having two physicians as part of our medical group, is that we do get double vision coverage. So our son got two pair of glasses. My prescription is so high and I need all those fancy things they provide, that I got one pair. It was a fun experience, and we went to Home Depot afternoon. I bought mulch to hopefully spread around my HMO guerilla gardening project. It was only $3 but I’m hoping it will help keep the succulents alive. That’s what one of my Instagram litterpicking friends said.

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July 3, 2021

by drplasticpicker

Good morning everyone. I am so happy to be on this earth with you. I truly am. I hope my trashart this morning makes you smile, and shows you how much love there can be in the world – that all creatures are beautiful. We are so lucky to be alive. I am lucky to be the human me, the doctor me, the mommy me, the wife me, the environmental activist me, and even the middle-management me (despite my ranting yesterday LOL).

What I love most about this trash art piece is that it incorporates that ubiquitous corner of the the kettle corn chicka boom popcorn bags Mr. Plastic Picker buys. We are not plastic free at our house, although we have made great strides in our waste reduction. Yesterday was a particularly good day because I talked to an FBI agent, and that agent brought some more closure to a patient case that were lingering in my mind and I closed all my charts. I CLOSED ALL MY CHARTS!!! Now that is something to celebrate indeed.

I even had enough time despite an overly full panel of patients yesterday to see my friend at the HMO coffee shop to get the coffee grounds for the day. It was a heavy bag and it went right into the composter. I now know that one of my friends who is an RN sometimes will get the coffee grounds when I’m not there. It is so beneficial for the environment that it just makes so much sense to me to use it for the garden. That is methane averted from the landfill, and it makes beautiful black compost gold for our garden.

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July 2, 2021

by drplasticpicker

I’ve let middle-management worry me (it is 18.75% of my job description – literally) the last two days. It is a complex system and it’s easy to become a creature of said system. I’m definitely strong enough to manuever within it and still stay effective and impactful. But it is so annoying. That’s all I can say about it. So many committees, office politics, minutiae. In the end, it’s the children that get the better care at the end that make it worthwhile. It’s my colleagues and trying to improve their lives, which give me strength. I know I have been a transformational leader and have given the HMO monolith bang for their MD Middle Management buck. But I had an epiphany this morning, just sitting here at 4AM and typing away. I finished watching a NetFlix series which was really heart-warming and touching, and should have slept more – but I didn’t because I have to help a student with an abstract for the upcoming AAP meeting. My epiphany as I roused myself to do something that was important for a student and the earth, is that if I “fail” at this Middle Management or I chose to “opt out” it is 100% the system.

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July 1, 2021

by drplasticpicker

Yesterday I felt literally and metaphorically “beat up.” I had a root canal and then I had to correctly address a middle-managment issue that required me to apologize. It was the right thing to do, but the circumstances that led up to that apology to a very wonderful person are so complex that it is mind-boggling. Sometimes I get so frustrated. If I was a man, I would not have to deal with many of the issues that make middle-management difficult. It’s still a man’s world, and as a technically part-time woman physician (supposedly 80%) leader – there is still so much unpaid work and responsibilities that I have to bear. It’s difficult for me because I’m the second income, and there is no financial or ego-motive for me. We are financially free, and it would be more cost-effective for me to return to clinic and just have the joy of seeing patients. I fundamentally love patient care. I since long got-over the ego-motives for being in physician leadership. We are glorified bean-counters and more like HOA-association heads. No real power, trying to get everyone to keep their front lawns up to made-up HOA specifications.

But I apologized and it was the right thing for the team, and my words were sincere. It wasn’t me, my actual person apologizing, it was Middle-Management Me apologizing. But in the back of the mind, I think of all the male leaders before me that never apologized. The Chief Boss a few chief bosses ago that made certain hiring decisions. The men that did untoward things to people that never fully had to own up to their moral transgressions. The men that sat there in the same position and essentially made a mess of the schedule that affected my life and the life of many working pediatrician mothers, and not many people said anything. The ones in leadership that formed a hiring system that is so stacked against BIPOC physicians, that it’s literally contributing to structural racism and health inequities. But it’s water under the bridge, and the current leadership team has no idea and they don’t need to know – because they weren’t even in our organization at that time. New team. It’s time to restart. It’s new relationships now. We have to build new connections and get to know eachother. But in my more vulnerable self, I feel hurt. I feel hurt not because of the actual situation that happened that required me to apolgize, but that I remember my journey to get to where I am. I see the accoloades that we are receiving for different metrics and how well run things are, and it was just assumed it was always like that. And I remember the past and how far it took us to get here, and no one remembers the steps and the efforts and the late nights trying to fix a system that seemed unfixable.

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June 30, 2021

by drplasticpicker

I have no idea what the image above means. All I know is an engineer worked on it, and the plans and project proposal was already done to build a bridge to cross Cows Creek on the timberland parcel of our Oregon Farm. The creek spans about 6 feet but it’s Riparian Habitat that we get a tax abatement on, and there are salamnders and fish in that creek that is fed by the southern Cascade mountains and feeds the reservoir. We want to be able to access the timberland recreationally for hiking and whatnot, and it seems good sense to go forwared and build the bridge.

The previous owners had sent us a sign-out document that was super interesting about the property. One of those pieces is this bridge. Anyway, I contacted the engineer that had been working on the property on behalf of our two families and asked if we could proceed with the project.

So Dr. Plastic Picker is literally building bridges!!! I ended my email to the engineer person with “We were hoping you could forward us and update us on any plans that were done already. We would love to continue to work with you to complete that project if possible. It seems like a connection across the creek, would be better for people and wildlife combined.” I thought that was a nice sentence.

And that is all! I find all of life, work, Oregon, my children, and the world – very interesting.

June 27, 2021

by drplasticpicker

It’s 3AM and the puppy and I are up. I simply had a cup of coffee at 6pm, and it was too late and now my sleep cycle is off. In general, my sleep is much better. This is in general a rare occassion. The puppy got up as well, and I let her out for a bit. Of course she barked into the empty night, and I opened the fridge and with the light of the fridge which she can see from the backyard – she comes running in. I give her a treat. She’s now comfortably asleep with the safest and most gentle person in the house, our teen son. She loves to curl in bed with him, right behind his knees. I saw my old mentor Dr. Ash yesterday and he always told me it was important for children to grow up with a dog. I sometimes would bristle at the lessons he tried to pass onto me, but in this as in many things he tried to impart – he was right.

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June 26, 2021

by drplasticpicker

Some of my family members are fishing up near the reservoir near our Oregon farm. Yes we are FARMERS!!! I actually know someone whose last name is Farmer. They are good friends. But we will be hobby farmers. But I can’t go up to Oregon eventhough it’s a paid off property because I still work. But I’m happy at work and just try to do a good job everyday and be happy, that is all you can ask of yourself. When you are in middle management, life is not that different. If you think life is different for a middle manager and there is more happiness, I would dissuade you from going into management. Happiness is found within not with fancy titles or power. Middle managment can be stressfull because you are trying to do work and think is a swirling mass of sometimes very disorganized people, and I’m super proud of myself that I’ve learned to reach this zen state that I can put that work in context, and find humour in chasing metrics and sitting at meeting after meeting. My biggest accomplishment is that I’m stream-lining committees and cancelling meetings! I love cancelling ineffective meetings!!! Time is money folks. I really don’t know why I’m in management really. I think it’s just because I wanted to attend my Crimson University 20th college reunion and have a fancy title to tell my classmates. I think that’s the truth. But after attending my reunion, I realized we just really cared about eachother. We celebrated everyone’s career advancements, but the most important part was whether we were each happy. And seeing happiness and joy of those we had attended college with, especially when we were what we called “blockmates,” was so wonderful.

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