June 4, 2020
On Tuesday I had a mentally exhausting day. Sometimes the mental exhaustion from work is not proportional to the “importance of the project.” I will probably be able to help change the entire leadership structure of our department quicker than it took to finish this project. Thus is the frustrations of middle management.
Every year as an office we give two large gifts to our nurses which the doctors contribute. The first is our Holiday Party and the second is Nurses’ week gifts. Our organization does not give bonuses, and it’s been traditional for the doctors to organize these two events. Early on in my career I avoided being the young woman who was saddled with these “fluff” tasks (trust me older male colleagues quickly tried to dump it on me) as I was well aware from my medical school mentors that as an ambiitious woman, one should not become the cupcake leader. These tasks take up a disproportionate amount of time, and even though one gets “thank yous” – there is no benefit to your career. I remember one year doing most of the organizing for our office parties along with the actual middle managment work, and realized years later there was a bonus that was given and it was given to the older male colleague and not me. I did the work and he had the title. Dr. Plastic Picker knows my value, my father is an accountant, and I was furious. It wasn’t the amount but more of the symbolism and the deception by omission. I would have probably just donated it anyway. Now I am in middle management doing the work, with the title and the bonus (if there is one that particular year). I warn our young women from getting saddled with “fluff” tasks this early on in their career, and also to make sure they are farily compensated.