September 17, 2020
I’m making cornbread this morning and I’m crying. It was supposed to be a vegan cornbread recipe, but I don’t have vegan butter nor non-dairy milk. I substituted real butter and real milk which pretty much just makes it cornbread. It’s not even imperfectly vegan cornbread. It’s definitely non-plastic at least. I’m not crying because it’s not vegan, I’m crying because I’m thinking about a really close friend that loves to cook. I wish I could call and text her as often as I used to about how much I’ve grown in my cooking. For various reasons our friendship has been one of those wonderful yet sometimes painful pairings. But anyway, I just miss my friend. I miss her when I cook and when I meet these milestones. The reason why is that she is a phenomenol and intuitive cook, and she knew me before I could cook. And she actually taught me a lot of things about cooking and life. We will just leave it at that. We are better off where we are now in our relationship, still true friends but more distant. I can’t believe I’m crying. This plastic picking and journey of discovery is literally making me process decades worth of issues. We all got issues. I’m just doing my own therapy through this blog in front of everyone.