June 27, 2020

by drplasticpicker

Dr. Plastic Picker is quite pleased with myself this morning. My friend Dr. Jill Gustafson had commented after I posted on my personal facebook page about Virtual Meeting Fatigue, that we should make up a meeting lingo bingo game. At one of my virtual vaccine meetings someone said the word “STAKE HOLDER” and that put me over the edge. I muted the meeting and started taking selfies of myself, and then took a nap. When I woke up and unmuted the mic, and the meeting was still ongoing and the lingo was continuing – although I did not hear the word STAKE HOLDER again.

Then yesterday, Dr. Dear Friend was listening to a regional virtual meeting, which I usually skip. I was eating my vegan leftovers but I get lonely eating by myself these days. So I stopped by Dr. Dear Friend’s offce and sat on the chair furthest from her. I tried to point my face 90 degrees from where she was facing and I was definitely 6 feet away, but I listened to the regional COVID-19 meeting as well. The meeting lingo was out of this world. I know about how to BS as I went to Crimson University and some would argue we are the most talented BSers out there. But the speaker who was a very high level person in the upper echelons of regional management (maybe even to the Federation Level), was impressive for the amount of lingo that came out without much actual substance to her words. Couldn’t they get to the point? How many N95 masks do we have? Are we still opening up July 1? The virtual meeting ended and the peons (which includes Departmental Assistant Bosses) went back to work actually taking care of patients. I had at least six patients with COVID-19 yesterday but luckily they were all telehealth.

I was starting to blog this Saturday morning, and Mr. Plastic Picker walked down to make his morning cup of coffee. He is reading xrays from home this morning and there are a lot of radiographs with ground-grass opacities which is indicative of COVID-19. It’s all really sad. The anti-maskers are pretty much like the anti-vaxers, and the disintegration of our civic life and common bonds is heart-breaking. This is partially why the COVID-19 pandemic continues. I had posted something about wearing masks on my personal facebook page, but I took it down. I don’t know if anyone is listening to anyone. I know my patients listen to me, and most of my patient panel are staying home and masking and heeding public health advice. Maybe I’ll make an anti-vaxer bingo game, that would be funny too. But I read to Mr. Plastic Picker the list of meeting lingo that Dr. Dear Friend, Dr. Jill Gustafson and I came up with – and he was impressed.

And then I just Googled or Ecosia-ed it. I typed in “How To Make Bingo Cards?” and I made them. So Assistant Boss Me is ready for the next meeting and I have 30 bingo cars with meeting lingo! I’m thinking that in honor of Dr. Jill Gustafson we should give out Bamboo Toothbrushes as prizes. She gifted me my first set, and I feel so beautiful and plastic free when I brush my teeth now.

It’s important to pay attention to parents and patients tell you their story. The hallmark of a good doctor is to allow the patient to talk and listen. The first day of medical school, a wise pediatric endocrinologist admonished our small patient-doctor group “90% of everything is history” and that has always served me well. It’s important to listen to public health advice. Wear your mask, stay six feet away, do not gather outside of your immediate household. If I have the energy I’ll post something this weekend about COVID-19 from notes fro m the last Pediatric Infectious Disease meeting. It’s important to know when to pay attention, like noticing a piece of glistening plastic and picking it up.

But it’s also important to know when to tune out. Tune out Trump. At some point you have to Tune out the Anti-vaxers and Anti-maskers at night after a full day of worrying about kids. Tune out those negative people who try to infect everyone with their bleak life view. When people come to my office and start complaining without offering solutions, I nod and can offer more compassion now – but I still tune them out. I especially tune out certain emails. But tuning those things out enables me to actually listen and pay attention to the moments that are important. But when you are at a meeting and the lingo is flowing fast and furious and you can’t mute the mic and shut off your camera and the Big Brother or Big HMO is watching you, feel free to pull out this Meeting Lingo Bingo Game! And if anyone asks you about the game, just tell them Dr. Plastic Picker gave it to you. Trust me, they will be so confused and wonder if I’m one of the new plastic surgeons or that you said Dr. Pimple Popper. LOL That was a fun post to write!

PS If anyone wants the 30 card game, just email me at drplasticpicker@gmail.com and I’ll email you the PDF!